46 and free
It’s a grey day outside, and if I’m honest, pretty much the same indoors. I attended a friend’s funeral recently, an educated intelligent man in his 40’s with so much to offer. However, through a series of devastating blows to his career and his business over the last few years, all beyond his control, he decided to take charge of his life in the only way he could think of. To end it all. In the way that he chose, and at the hour of his choosing, His life’s motto was “my life, my rules” and he lived that to the end of his days.
It was a bitter blow to those who knew and loved him. He was a man with a plan, a perfectionist and a dreamer. At his service, the minister officiating reminded us how that little dash between the two dates defined the period of time that he was here, representing everything that happened between those two dates. There is no ’some day’ or ‘one day’ there is only today.
Hard lessons
It’s a hard lesson to swallow. How often do we find ourselves drifting along, going with the flow, just dealing with the disappointments, ignoring the frustrations until… what? Until it’s more than we can bear? Or until we wake up and realise that there is no more useful time for the big dream. That one day is gone and some day never happened because we were too afraid to take the leap. Whatever may be said about my friend’s choices, he made the leap from the mundane before the end. He moved across the country, bought a restaurant and tried to start a new life somewhere beautiful - he chased a dream. What’s so wrong about that. Absolutely nothing. He dared to dream, he tried to live big, he faced the failures and heartbreak, and in the end lived far more courageously than I do.
I don’t know that I have the strength to be as brave in the pursuit of my dreams, but maybe a little bit braver than I have been. For that reason alone, I have my friend to thank. For the reminder that time is short. There is only now. I wish that it didn’t have to be this way. I wish that we’d had the chance to share a meal and some wine and couple of laughs one more time.
Cheers Wayne, thanks for everything.